My tryst with history

 

With my renewed interest in understanding the story of evolution, cultural and social amalgamation, geo-politics and world events of the past and recent times; I chose to formally learn ‘History’. Here are my musings after completing one year of course -work

A typical day would run by the clock,
To break the monotony is what I thought
Fantastical, factual and full of mystery,
I chose to delve into the realms of history
 
The story of humankind spans over 6mn years,
It is filled with valour, accomplishment, strife and fears
Historians have unravelled the why and how,
Paving way to discover the here and now!
 
To open the doors of the future,
Will you exhume the ghosts of the past?
For they say that history repeats itself, and
It is only the legacy that lasts…
 
The legacy of the past and the one that we leave,
Will comprise the perspectives from the thoughts we weave
As the human tree grows branching into the sky,
The roots seem to weaken and heave a sigh…
 
What is taught in school, is it for real;
For it meant I expected the state to be ideal
In a world which changes in months and days,
How will the relevance of history stay?
 
Explore the culture, the heritage and religion,
For every crusade has a purpose and ambition
The avenues to learn history are many,
I hope to inspire you to get on, any!
 

 

Welcome, little roommate!

 

A busy year with smiles and fears,

Anxious moments and joyful tears,

What has changed, I am sure you can guess

Our little bundle of joy, I must confess!

 

Our world has changed and will never be the same

Nappy rash, spit ups, coos and cuddles are to blame!

Milestones and vaccinations are many to track

At times we barely get time to snack!

 

Toothless smiles are the best in town

Teething pain is the biggest reason to frown

Music library has forever changed

Chandoba, naani ki morni and cocomelon are all in range :)

 

They say a child is a father of a man,

Who ensures things will not always go as per plan

At times I am overwhelmed, at times I could cry

Patience and resilience, all worth a try...

 

Never knew I could love so much,

Never knew I could care such a lot,

Newer meanings to life I discover,

Each day as I come along! 

Happy Place

 Life is full of ups and downs; the downs far more felt than the ups... While braving these downs at times you want to hide, you want to run or you just want to feel good about yourself. That's when you go to your secret hideout, your happy place!

When your heart is beating fast, 
In your head spin thoughts so vast, 
When you constantly seek solace,
As you know your mind is going to ache

Trouble at work or folks driving you beserk,

Really hard day keeping your peace at bay,

Piled up emotions that well you up, 

You feel that you've just ran out of luck

You want to let go, or scream or cry, 

Routines and notions you want to defy,

That's when you need a place to hide,

In it your heart will calmly reside 

Snuggle upto your mom, your spouse or your child, 

Or a friend who will unfold the thoughts that 've been piled,

Someone who will put back the smile on your face,

Bring back with love your forgotten grace...

Give you all the strength you need to ace, 

This O' dear! is your happy place :)

Of resolutions and commitments

 

End of 2016, when my attempts to find a match via various matrimony.coms weren’t bearing significant fruits, I decided to invest in myself; in more than one way

Start of 2017, I started using Healthifyme and Duolingo, as part of new year resolution. It is now end of 2020, and I still use both the apps with great discipline. While I might have given too much personal longitudinal behavioural data to Healthifyme, it has ensured I kept my protein and fibre intake in check and never let my weight go over a certain integer. I allow myself to cheat on fats and carbs because I am genetically blessed, may not be true for everyone. However, the limited point is, it doesn’t take too much to take control of what you eat; less than 2 mins per day to track

Languages fascinated me, like a true engineer. They just weren’t coding languages! Zindagi na milegi dobara sowed the Eurotrip seeds in most Indian millennials. Well, a few many years into our 20s, we managed to go on one. Hence, basic hi-hellos, left-rights, yes-no, good day, bye-bye, sir-ma’am was what we wanted to learn before we hit Madrid. Secret girlie plan was to get dos chicas to start talking to guapo hombres ;)

4 years of Duolingo for less than 5 minutes daily has ensured that I can read and understand Spanish language to an extent. Native speakers are too fast for me to comprehend but I am happy that I can appreciate a language that a good amount of humanity speaks. I can occasionally shake a leg on Despacito while I sing along!

In Dec 2019, I switched jobs and my manager gifted me a fitbit. I parked it for a month but as a part of ‘being active’ resolution I started using it from Jan 1, 2020. It has been 12 months and I have gotten used to meeting my exercise goals. I occasionally become the amusing person who gets up and starts walking in the middle of a seated drinks session with family and friends; to ensure I clock my 250 steps for an active hour :D

The black swan year of 2020 gave us many avenues to revisit our priorities in life. Boundaries between work and life, weekdays and weekends collapsed for people who had jobs. Many lost jobs and most never received an interview call to their endless applications

With the negativity and stress levels so high, it was difficult to breathe easy. Weekends were spent in heavy lifting household chores. After a point in time, I hated weekends because I couldn’t sweep any longer! That’s when I took the paint brush and started painting. In the last 8 months, I have created 3 canvases and the bliss of creating something is always incredible. A genuinely mature and encouraging husband has been the biggest icing on my cake and we have done some of these many things together

This year has taught us a very important lesson to take care of ourselves. Care is not limited to avoiding a virus. Peace of mind and a state of positivity can alone lead to better physical health and holistic oneness. I strongly believe that investing in oneself is more important than people perceive it to be. A happy person will be able to make efforts towards making his loved ones happier. Pursuing my hobbies, interests, personal fitness goals, learning from coursera certainly helped me get more control of myself and kept me positively occupied when the pandemic (or Teams calls) was getting too much

It is genuinely not that difficult to do new things in a middle of a busy routine; it just needs a bit of dedication and discipline. I urge you all to make commitments to yourself and follow them through. A few years later when you look back at how you have grown, it will inspire you to only become better! They say only bite as much as you can chew; but most of us hesitate to take a bite in the first place. The few who take the bite, forget to chew

Let’s make every day count people! To a happier 2021!!

P.S. I resolved to start writing a diary back in 2010 and I still do it, don’t think I have missed even a single day

P.P.S. I resolved to not let my blog which was started in 2008 to be dead, so I at least write 1 entry per year

P.P.P.S. Collectively my diary, duolingo and healthifyme takes 10 minutes in a day; don’t tell me you don’t have 10 mins for yourself!!

Fair play

Another year was drawing to a close and my mandatory annual blog entry was still pending. This had been the most eventful year in my life which included my getting married and getting gifted the first pair of Aldo shoes! Despite such life changing events, my blog still awaited a refresh

I had to google creative writing ideas to start penning my thoughts down. A scan of the preceding pages of my blog showed the rigour with which I wrote, I expressed about things I felt or about things that mattered to me. Did I stop feeling? Or worse, did I stop thinking or is this what happens when you cross your thirties?? Did I just suddenly inherit reticence out of nowhere? Or am I scared to say things out loud?!

Over the last few years of my working life, I have come to form an opinion about sustenance of women in corporate. I work with an equal opportunity employer. What I have concluded off-late is that opportunity is not a concern, the working environment is. It was further fueled after reading Lean In. Over the years I have interacted with a lot of internal and external stakeholders. When I was introduced as a project lead, team lead, point person etc, an immediate response would be – ‘Which batch of MBA are you?’ Over time, it became easy to realize that what follows this question is a judgement on lack of experience and a question mark on capability. It is not easy to accept a young manager, more so if it is a female manager. There is a fair amount of scanning and guesstimation of age – more so if you are single. Senior women leaders and mentors at times agreed that it helps to ‘look’ older. A woman who is capable but cannot drink with her male counterparts or partners at work, also at times takes longer to rise up the corporate ladder. This somewhere makes the entire premise of equal opportunity fallible. Most women I know had no choice but to move companies post their maternity leave because the growth options upon their return were limited or not thought through at all. What is a bigger concern is that most women accept a base rating during the appraisal year if they have taken a maternity leave. It is further expected that women make 2-3 career compromises. First one, at the time of marriage. Almost always, the would-be bride relocates because a fellow woman (mother-in-law) feels that the son’s career is more important. Second or third compromise comes at the time of maternity depending on the number of kids she decides to have. A prospective company feels it is their right to ask a woman candidate her marriage thoughts or family plans because corporations weigh business continuity far higher than sensitivity. Be it 8 am or 8pm, calls, reviews and meetings, working Sundays just go on to show disrespect towards personal life and more so for women who also have to probably instruct the maid, feed the baby, replenish the grocery of the house or pack tiffins

Women tend to bring a lot to the table; dedication, compassion and a silent determination which is also sometimes perceived as ‘not enough aggression’. How could I miss hurling abuses as a must-do in the upper echelons of the man’s world? A woman is judged for the way she dresses, she speaks, she abuses, her food as well as her drinking/ smoking habits. While everyone has to prove their worth, a women additionally also has to justify her standing shoulder to shoulder with a male colleague; more so at senior positions. I would also like to mention that some women also make principle level compromises and these are encouraged by her male colleagues. This makes the rest of the world believe that women have it easy. It is unfair but true, because few women chose to be ‘easy’

All said and done, women in corporate today are role models to young girls for whom good education and a great career is the sole way leading to a better life. The group I work for takes care of creating a conducive work environment but on a larger scale the efforts need to be a lot more conscious. What we need is not just equal opportunity employers, but sensitive employers as well as colleagues who would encourage and enable women to give their best!

Ascend

‘Get up or you will miss the sunrise!’ was a beautiful contrast to ‘get up or you will miss the bus.’ 6 days amid the Himalayas was an inexplicable sojourn into a world which was unaffected by the fancies, fallacies or the miseries of the mortal world where I had to eventually return

The stay order on camping at various sites in Uttarakhand did dampen our spirits briefly, however we had chosen between Dayara Bugyal and Phulara Ridge after Kuari Pass got cancelled. Dayara Bugyal it was, after some soul searching which was not influenced by Quora users. Flight, AC train and a tempo traveler which allowed the Dehradun breeze to drift in; brought us to the basecamp from where we were to begin a 30 kilometers journey on foot along the meadows and ridges of the mighty Himalayas

Rewind 30 days; and our group of 8 realized we need to take this trip seriously. Well, you cannot just wake up one fine day and start ascending to reach 13000 feet above sea level. Thus commenced the efforts to take care of oneself. From different locations, in groups of twos and threes, we did our 5k jogs; posted our pace values and routes to inspire or make others envious! We tried getting into a routine wherein we slept well, ate well and had enough energy to challenge our 5k pace day after day. Shoes, warm clothes, torches, et al, we shopped together; created a master list for packing and started counting days for a trek of a lifetime!

Little did I know what to expect beyond starlit skies and chilling winds for the next 4 days. Having a Brit trek leader did add a touch of glamor to the experience! For 4 days after the morning we left the base camp, we did not have tap water, electricity or a roof over our heads. We walked 7-8 kms each day, taking community breaks where healthy finger food and water infused with ORS was shared. I don’t remember awaiting vegetarian food more than what I did during this trip! Black tea at 6am, breakfast at 7, lunch at 2, tea with snacks at 4:30, soup at 6 and dinner at 8; Indiahikes ensured we were well fed. The cold and the climb burnt the calories consumed in this elaborate meal plan. On the first night, we had dinner in our individual plates. Fairly soon, we realized washing a plate, bowl n spoon individually in the freezing cold water was the toughest task at hand. A lot of plate sharing followed in the subsequent meals, initially out of convenience; later out of care. Measuring the blood pressure and SpO2 created a lot of suspense because no one wanted to be prone to altitude sickness. The days were beautiful, we could catch the sun rise, the wild flowers, fiery red autumn leaves and the peaks seemed like they were at a stone throw away! Gangotri, John Lee, Draupadi ka danda became familiar like M G Road and LBS Marg! Being one with nature was an overly used yet a huge understatement. Stretching together was another fun activity to do. Nature’s calls were challenging, the long ones more than the short ones!

The first night I was sleepless, 4 layers couldn’t warm me enough, the sleeping bag was inconvenient and the liner stifled my entire body. I wouldn’t step out of the tent in the middle of the night to pee because it was too cold and too dark. It was almost like programming micturition! The dog at times barked, the neighbor snored and the cold gave grief but I lay still trying to sleep. The following night I gained immunity against the snoring, the liner was probably a tad bit more comfortable but sleep was still disturbed. The third day tired us so much that I slept like a baby that night oblivious to the dog, the snores and the discomfort of the sleeping bag. It was blissful getting up to snow on the tents and frozen rivulets which gullied the basecamp. Un-pitching the tent was another tiresome task. Pulling out the hooks, rods and squeezing the tent into a duffle bag was quite difficult with frozen hands. As conscious trekkers, we carried waste along the way in our eco-bags and contributed to preserving nature in little ways we could

When I narrated the routine to my mother, she asked why one would cause oneself so much discomfort and complete a task which required so much effort; when the entire thing could be easily avoided!! I could have initially said that I did all of this for climbing a mountain, it is no child’s play! Looking back, I think there is so much more to a trekking expedition that just climbing a mountain. Right from packing our bags to eating off shared plates, to not using plastic or telephone network or electricity to consciously clearing litter on the way; the mountain life is all about minimalism and making the most out of available resources. When you carry your weight on your back, you do not carry 6 sets of clothes for two days. You probably carry two shirts and one pajama. How often do we feel grateful for the tap water running 24*7 or a heater in our bathrooms or the mattresses on our king size beds and our maid who does the dishes? Affluence in many ways makes us take the basics for granted. I honestly feel a trek connects us to the basics, makes us more responsible and has the power to humble individuals. Very often our necessities escalate to desires and then further to wants and needs. You and I, fortunately or otherwise are preys to the delights of city life. Routine life puts us back into the quest to be the best and to be able to finish first in everything we do. The best part in a trek is no one tries to climb the summit first, everyone walks together ensuring that each one of us is safe and energized. Once you actually climb the summit, you aren’t sure if the journey was beautiful or the destination is!

To sum up my experience, I would say trekking is not about climbing the mountain, it is just something that happens along the way!

Topics under the burkha

While office commute can be a source of endless complaints and heartburn, it can be a blessing in disguise. It is completely your ‘me time’ and it can run into 1, 2 or more than 3 hours daily. Imagine in a day of 24 hours, where people choose to work for over 12; this is the time when you can completely zone out. Maybe drive, listen to music, pray, read, watch a series or chose to talk to all the friends and family members who you ignored through the day

On one such day at work, I happened to time my exit perfectly well with a couple of colleagues who could give a free home delivery of my self. At times a company is not always considered as intruding upon this ‘me time’. After complaining about controllable and uncontrollable things at work, we decided to give ourselves a break and talk about everything but anything related to office. From which are the newly opened restaurants or movies you have watched recently; our conversation went to women empowerment. A theme, maybe overused, abused in all forms of media. Lipstick under my burkha was a trigger for this discussion. While one of them said it was too dark, the other said it was soft porn and one felt it was real but crude

If you think about it, why would you call it soft porn? The movie did talk about female sexuality in a nation which is probably sexually frustrated. But it also did tell the story of an aspiring rockstar and woman trying to gain financial independence. But what most chose to remember was a hag who fantasized in her old age and the young girl who couldn’t take a stand between her boyfriend and her fiancé. We all know pornographic content is viewed the most on mobile phones. People across social strata, literally invest in data packs to calm their nerves or possibly titillate their senses. One of the colleagues said India’s population is testimony to the horniness of the country. Well, I flatly refused the claim saying it is the testimony to India’s under-education in the areas which need a lot of attention. We all have seen people abroad making out in trams or metros; we still are a nation which tries to ‘get a room’ in most circumstances if our wallets / houses provide. So yes, we are not the horniest; probably a highly curious and an unsatisfied bunch of people somewhere struggling between traditional expectations and a modern outlook

Having read a couple of adaptations of the Mahabharat, and a few other mythologies; I strongly feel India has regressed greatly in the last 200 years. If our schools taught the unadulterated version of the Mahabharat, our children would have understood teenage pregnancies, surrogacy, infidelity, polygamy a lot better than what they do today by talking under wraps. Not only is the epic one of best ways to understand human emotions of love, enmity, friendship and deceit; one can have modern day parallels to everything that happened thousands of years ago. It is hypocritical how carvings on the temple of Khajuraho are pious but uttering the s-word is against morality! We are the same nation which spoke boldly about Balbir Pasha a couple of years ago but is banning condom ads during the day, today! Possibly people dying of STDs is a better way to control population!

I briefly did feel bad about the state of affairs but then got back to reading The Great Indian Novel, where my favorite characters from the Mahabharat were brought to life during the British Raj